Save for marriage!

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    A priest was taking a shortcut through an alley one day and came upon a young boy who was masturbating.
    "My son, you shouldn't be doing that," said the priest. "You should be saving that for when you get married."
    The embarrassed boy hung his head down low and simply said, "Yes, Father."
    About 10 years later, the priest was in his study when a young man in his early twenties came in.
    "Yes, my son?" said the priest.
    "Father, you may not remember me, but about 10 years ago you caught me masturbating in an alley, and I'll never forget the advice you gave then."
    "And what was that, my son?"
    "Well, you told me that what I was doing was wrong and I should be saving it for when I get married," said the young man.
    "That sounds like something I probably would have said," said the priest. "Did you take my advice?"
    "Yes I did, Father, but there's only one problem."
    "What's that, my son?"
    "Well, I have a 45-gallon drum of the stuff in the back of my pickup truck. Now that I am getting married, what am I supposed to do with it?"
  • Don't shoot!!! Banta, a bartender in Chandigarh, was getting ready to close for the night when a robber with a ski mask burst in and pulls a gun.
    He yells to Banta, 'This is a stick-up! Put all your dough in this bag!'
    The scared Banta pleads, 'Don't shoot, please! I'll...
  • Hot day! A minister, a priest and a rabbi went for a hike one very hot day. They were sweating profusely by the time they came upon a small lake with a sandy beach. Since it was a secluded spot, they left all their clothes on a big log, ran down the beach to the lake and jumped in the water for a long, refreshing swim.
    Refreshed, they were halfway back up the beach to the spot...
  • Ford's invention Henry Ford dies and goes to heaven. At the Gates, St. Peter greets Ford and tells him, 'Well, you've been such a good guy, and your invention... the Assembly line for the automobile... changed the world. As a reward, you can hang out with anyone in Heaven you want.'
    Ford thinks about it, and says...
  • Too expensive! Santa goes to Chandigarh, on a business trip, for the first time. After checking in to the hotel he goes down to the bar to have a drink. He orders a whisky and soda.
    The bartender gives it to him and says, 'That will be five hundred rupees.'
    He gives the bartender the money and says...
  • Turn over! Santa and Banta are having beer one night when Banta announces that he's going to divorce his wife, Preeto.
    'Good grief' says Santa, 'You and Preeto are the happiest couple I know - why on earth would you want to divorce such a...
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