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    Santa went to his local Doctor and said, "Doctor, I've got a problem, but if you're going to treat it, first you've got to promise me, and I mean it - not to laugh."
    "Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient.
    "Okay then," Santa said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest peni$ the doctor had seen in all his years.
    Unable to control himself, the doctor fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure.
    "I'm so sorry," he said. "I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it absolutely will not happen again. Ever. Now what seems to be the problem?"
    "It's swollen!"
  • Too big! Santa and Jeeto were planning to go on a second honeymoon for their 10th wedding anniversary.
    Jeeto said, 'We will go to all the same places that we did on our first honeymoon...
  • Perfect body! Taxi driver, Banta, picked up a girl after a day's hard work, went home with her and took her to bed. He fell asleep only to be awakened suddenly when she smacked him in the face.
    'What's the matter? Didn't I satisfy...
  • Seniority at brothel! A dedicated Teamsters Union worker was attending a convention in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels nearby.
    When he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, 'Is this a union house?'
    'No,' she replied, 'I'm sorry...
  • Paralyzed! A blonde is crossing the road when she gets run over. She is lying on the ground as the driver rushes out of the car to her.
    'Are you all right?' he asks her.
    'Everything is just...
  • Ball replacement! This memo is from an unnamed computer company. It went to all field engineers about a computer peripheral problem. The author of this memo was quite serious. The engineers rolled on the floor laughing.
    Mouse balls are now available as FRU (Field Replacement Unit). Therefore, if a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a...
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