The first timer...

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    A man was wheeling himself frantically down the hall of the hospital in his wheelchair, just before his operation.
    A nurse stopped him, and asked, "What's the matter?"
    He said, "I heard the nurse say, It's a very simple operation. Don't worry, I'm sure it will be all right."
    "She was just trying to comfort you, what's so frightening about that?"
    "She wasn't talking to me. She was talking to the doctor!"
  • Buying E-beg.com A poor, downtrodden beggar stands on the street, not having much luck. Exasperated and hungry he decides to make a sign, and hastily scrawls the word 'Beg' on a piece of cardboard.
    Hardly anyone pays him and his new sign...
  • Smartest Man! A doctor, a lawyer, a little boy and a priest were out for a Sunday afternoon flight on a small private plane. Suddenly, the plane developed engine trouble.
    In spite of the best efforts of the pilot...
  • Speed limit A traffic Policeman stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name.
    She said, 'I'm Mrs. Ladislav Abdulkhashim Zybkcicraznovskaya from the Republic of...
  • Day's off! Banta goes to see his supervisor in the front office.
    'Sir,' he says, 'we're doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife, Preeto, needs...
  • Lion tamer! 'I'm going to become a lion tamer.'
    'That's crazy, you don't know nothing about lion taming.'
    'Yes I do!'
    'Well, OK, answer me this. When one of those lions comes at you all roaring and biting...
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