•  

    Three old timers were relating their most exciting experiences. The first, a retired sheriff, described the terrifying excitement of a shoot-out with Bonnie and Clyde back in his younger days. The other gents nodded and agreed that that, indeed, would have been exciting.
    The second, a retired fireman, related the tale of a huge fire at the university several years back. There were flames, firetrucks from several area fire departments, but the most exciting part were the naked coeds jumping from their dorm windows into his arms. The others gents agreed that had to be a very exciting time.
    The third guy started, "I was an undertaker. One night I got a call to pick up a body that was under a sheet in a hotel room. When I got there, the guy had a huge erection. I knew there was no way I could get him through the lobby like that. So I found an old broom and whacked that erection just as hard as I could to make it go down." He paused.
    The retired fireman asked, "So, how was that exciting?"
    The undertaker answered, "Well, you see, I was in the wrong room."
  • Little finger! Little Johnny had to walk past a whorehouse to get to school and back.
    One morning a whore on the second floor porch hollered down, 'Hi little boy!', and waved at him with her...
  • Unaffordable! Two neighbors, Santa and Banta, were talking across the fence one day. Banta couldn't keep his eyes off Santa's wife, Jeeto.
    He popped off and said, 'Damn, your wife's got a nice set...
  • Nuns bike A group of sister from a local convent were out for their Sunday bike ride through the suburbs. They were quite a site, seven in a row on one of those seven seater tandem bikes, headed, of course by mother superior.
    They went over a speed bump...
  • Vital stats! Trying to make up for bad behaviour, Santa went to the shopping mall to buy his wife, Jeeto, a gift.
    'I would like to buy some gloves for my wife,' he says eyeing the attractive salesgirl, 'but I don't know...
  • Mental asylum Once a Minister went to the Mental Asylum to see the condition of the people kept there. He saw that some had gone from bad to worse and some were improving. After inspecting some he came to a corner and saw...
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT