A fellow is getting ready to tee-off on the first hole when a second fellow approaches and asks if he can join him. The first says that he usually plays alone but agrees to let the second guy join him. Both are even after the first couple of holes.
The second guy says, "Say, we're about evenly matched, how about we play for five bucks a hole?"
The first fellow says that he usually plays alone and doesn't like to bet, but agrees to the terms. Well, the second guy wins the rest of the holes and as they're walking off of the eighteenth hole, and while counting his $80.00, he confesses that he's the pro at a neighboring course and likes to pick on suckers.
The first fellow reveals that he's the Parish Priest at the local Catholic Church to which the second fellow gets all flustered and apologetic and offers to give the Priest back his money.
The Priest says, "No, no. You won fair and square and I was foolish to bet with you. You keep your winnings."
The pro says, "Well, is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"
The Priest says, "Well, you could come to Mass on Sunday and make a donation. Then, if you bring your mother and father by after Mass, I'll marry them for you." |
Spelling Bee Agatha's 5-year-old developed a strong interest in spelling once she learned to spell STOP. After that, she tried to figure out her own words. From the back seat of the car... 
Drinking Horse A MAN in western attire went into a bar and asked for 30 martinis in a bucket. "What?" questioned the bartender, "Why would you want so many martinis... 
Deer Hunting Two hunters are hunting deer in the Western USA. They spot some deer on a farmer's land and they decide to go ask the farmer if he will let them hunt on his land. Only one of the guys... 
A Puking Drunk A taxi driver goes to a bar to pick up his fare, a really drunk guy who has been in the bar way too long. After giving directions back to his house, he and the taxi driver... 
Blonde Waitress "How come you're late?" asks the bartender as the blonde waitress walks in the door. "It was awful," she explains. "I was walking down the street and there was this...