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A woman walks into a pet shop hoping to find the right pet. She wonders around for a while and she stumbles on to this big ass parrot in this huge cage.
She checks it out for a minute and notices that the parrot has two strings hanging down. On the right foot is a red string and on the left foot is a yellow string. She calls the pet shop manager over and asks him what the strings mean.
He say's, "Well madam, if you pull the red string he will sing a hymn and if you pull the yellow string he will say a prayer."
So the woman thinks out loud, "What would happen if I pulled both strings at the same time?"
The parrots eyes got real big and he looked at her and screamed out, "I'd fall on my ass you silly bitch!"
- The End Is Near! A pastor and a priest from the local parishes are standng by the side of the road, holding up a sign that reads...
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