That Aren't So Stupid!

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    So, where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year? - Christina Aguilera

    What’s Wal-Mart? Do they sell, like wall stuff?” - Paris Hilton

    Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
    Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."--Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest

    "Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff."- Mariah Carey

    "Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are." - Matt Lauer on NBC's Today Show

    "I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law." - David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.

    "Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life." - Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign.

    "I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body." - Winston Bennett, Univ. of KY basketball forward.

    "I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president." - Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents.

    "That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it." - A Congressional Candidate in Texas

    "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it." - Former US Vice-President Dan Quayle
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  • Letter of Recommendation While working with Mr. Smith, I have always found him working studiously and sincerely at his table without...
  • Naughty Rhymes Naughty Rhymes The grade 5 teacher one day asked the children in her class to make rhymes with their names. First up was Dan...
  • A Forgiving Woman A Forgiving Woman Toward the end of Sunday service, the Minister asked, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?
  • Big Donation Father O'Malley answers the phone. 'Hello, is this Father O'Malley?'
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