Mature Jokes

The Phrases of what Professionals say, when put together, reads something like this:
Doctor: Please take off your clothes.
Dentist: Now open wide and hold stil. Veterinarian: How's your pretty pussy?

A gay was driving his sports car around the corner, when an eighteen wheeler pulled out of the alley and directly in front of his way. The sports car plows into the truck and totally demolishes...

A guy goes inside the confessional and says, "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."
"What did you do, my son?" asked the priest...

A couple was going to a Halloween party. The husband was unsure of what costume to wear. His wife was telling him to hurry or they would be late for the party...

Every year at the state fair Paul entered the lottery for the brand new truck and lost. This year, he told his friend David, he wasn't going to bother and enter...

A man walks into a store. "I'd like to buy some gloves for my wife," the young man said, eyeing the attractive salesgirl, "but I don't know her size...

From the outset, the blind date was a fiasco, and it was intensified by the fact that the fellow was too insensitive, uncouth, and ego-ridden to realize it.
The moment of truth came in the supper club as he clutched the girl's thigh...........

"So, how did it happen?" the doctor asked the middle-aged farmhand as he set the man's broken leg.
"Well, doc, 25 years ago...

1. It makes some people religious: Oh my God! Yes! My God!
2. It gives some people their first musical lesson...

Question to Confucius:
Woman: "If I sleep with three men, everyone calls me a slut. But when a man sleeps with ten women, every one calls him...