| A lovely blonde had just had a complete physical after having missed two consecutive menstrual periods. "Well, Mrs. Appleby," smiled her doctor. "I have good news for you." "Wait, Doctor," she interrupted. "It's not MRS. Appleby...it's MISS Appleby." "Oh," said the doctor. "In that case, Miss Appleby, I have bad news for you." |
| A stunning blonde had gone to her student advisor for some course problems, but seemed to be paying only half attention to his replies. "Are you feeling OK?" he asked. "Well, to be honest, I have this compulsion to have sex with every man I meet," she admitted. "Is there a name for my condition?" "Why yes, there is," he said, as he picked her up and began carrying her to the couch. "It's called 'Good News'." |
| A man requested a female blonde painter to paint him in the nude. "No," the talented blonde artist said. "I don't do that sort of thing." "I'll increase your fee two times," he said. "No, no thanks.." "I'll give five times as much as you normally get." She thought about this, "Okay," she finally said, "But you have to let me at least wear my socks. I need somewhere to place my brushes." |
| A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were having a breast stroke swimming contest to see who the better swimmer was. It was a 5 mile race. At the finish, the redhead came first, then the brunette, and finally, after two hours of waiting, the blonde arrived, completely exhausted. The red head and the brunette asked what had taken her so long. The blonde replied, "Well, I don't want to be picky or anything, but, I think you two were using you're hands!" |