| A blonde call girl was being driven to a secluded spot by a client when his car left the road, hit a tree and she was flung through the windshield. She was rushed to the hospital with blood pouring from her head and face. Once at the hospital she clamped her hands to her face and began to scream, "I'm blind. I'm blind. Fetch me a doctor quick." A doctor was summoned and quickly deduced that it was the blood from her wounds which were blocking her vision and he tried to reassure her to this effect. She, however, insisted, continuing to shout, "I'm blind. I'm blind." The doctor pried away her hands from her face and began to wash away the blood from her eyes. When he had removed what he considered enough, he stood back and said, "How many fingers do I have up?" The call girl thought for a few seconds then a look of horror spread across her face, "Oh God!" she exclaimed. "I'm paralyzed too!" |
| Three women, A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde, all come home from work at the same time and get on the elevator. The brunette notices a blob on the elevator wall and says, "OOOOOhhh that looks like semen." She reaches out and touches the blob with her fingers and says, "It feels like semen." The redhead reaches out and touches it with her fingers, smells it, and says, "It smells like semen." The blonde, reaches out and touches it with her fingers and then puts her fingers in her mouth and tastes it and says, "It doesn't taste like anyone in this buildin ..." |
| Two blondes walk up to a perfume counter. The first one picks up a sample bottle, sprays it on her wrist, smells it, and says, "That's nice, don't you think, Steffi?" Steffi says, "Yeah. What's it called, Susie?" Susie says, "Viens a moi." Steffi says, "Viens a moi? What's that mean?" The store clerk says, "Viens a moi, ladies, is French for 'Come to me.'" Susie takes another sniff and says, "That doesn't smell like come to me. Does it smell like come to you?" |
| A blonde's car breaks down on the Interstate one day. So, she eases it over onto the shoulder of the road. She carefully steps out of the car and opens the trunk. Out jump two men in trench coats who walk to the rear of the vehicle where they stand facing oncoming traffic and begin opening their coats and exposing their nude bodies to approaching drivers. Not surprisingly, one of the worst pileups in history of this highway occurs. It's not very long before a police car shows up. The cop, clearly enraged, runs toward the blonde of the disabled vehicle yelling, "What the hell is going on here?" "My car broke down," says the lady, calmly. "Well, what are these perverts doing here by the road?!" asks the cop. "Those are my emergency flashers!" she replied. |