| There once was a Red Indian whose given name was "Onestone". So named because he had only one testicle. He hated that name and asked everyone not to call him Onestone. After years and years of torment, Onestone finally cracked and said, "If anyone calls me Onestone again I will kill them!" The word got around and nobody called him that any more. Then one day a young woman named Blue Bird forgot and said, "Good morning, Onestone." He jumped up, grabbed her and took her deep into the forest where he made love to her all day and all night. He made love to her all the next day, until Blue Bird died from exhaustion. The word got around that Onestone meant what he promised he would do. Years went by and no one dared call him by his given name until a woman named Yellow Bird returned to the village after being away for many years. Yellow Bird, who was Blue Bird's cousin, was overjoyed when she saw Onestone. She hugged him and said, "Good to see you, Onestone." Onestone grabbed her, took her deep into the forest, then he made love to her all day, made love to her all night, made love to her all the next day, made love to her all the next night, but Yellow Bird wouldn't die! What is the moral of this story?? OH, come on..take a guess! Think about it. (You're going to love this!) And the moral is... ...You can't kill two birds with one stone!!! |
| A Briton, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden. "Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British." "Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They're naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French." "No way! They have no clothes and no shelter," the Russian points out, "They have only an apple to eat, and are being told they live in a paradise. Obviously, they are Russian." |
| There were these three guys at the lake, a German, an Englishman and a Nigerian. The German took out his dick, put it in the water, waited a while and told the others: "I can feel the water it's a 32 degrees Celsius." The other two were amazed. "Let me try", the Englishman said. So he put his organ in the water, waited and said: "To be more exact, the temperature is 32.3" At last the black man took his equipment, lowered it into the lake and said: "I've no idea about the temperature, but the water is 2 feet 9 inches deep." |
| Three guys were deciding where to go drinking tonight. The first, an Italian, said, "Let's go the the Italian-American Club. I heard that if you buy one beer you get the second for free." The second guy, a Frenchman, said, "That sounds good but I heard that if you go to the Franco-american club, when you buy one beer, you get TWO for free." The third guy, a Polish guy, said, "Hold on... we have to go to the Polish-American club. I heard that they buy you drinks all night and at closing time they take you to the parking lot and you get LAID!!! "Wow!" said the other two. "Where did you hear about that?" The Polish guy stated, "I overheard my WIFE talking about it with my sister." |