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Cheating Lawyer
A lawyer came home after having sex in his car. Girl forgot her bra and panty in car.
The wife found them, tore them up and shouted: You dirty Man..... you have been screwing ur secretary.
Without blinking an eyelid, lawyer shouted back: You have just destroyed the only evidence of a high profile rape case I have been working on. You can now forget about diamond necklace you were asking for.
Wife fell on her knees, crying & trying 2 repair the torn pieces & lawyer walked away wid a smile...
Moral: Start studying LAW. -
Sexy Secretary!
Two law partners hire a sexy, young secretary, and though they're both already married, they agree to see who can score with her first.
Eventually, one of them scores with her, and his partner is quite eager to hear how things went.
"So, what did you think?" asks the partner.
"Ah," replies the first partner, "my wife is better."
Some time goes by, and then the second lawyer goes to bed with the young secretary.
"So," asks the first partner, "what did you think?"
The second partner replies, "You're right... your wife is better." -
Leather Briefcase
While walking through a courthouse, a kid enters an empty courtroom.
He sees a fine leather briefcase (the kind the lawyers carry) sitting on the table, picks it up and exits through the back door of the courtroom into the judge's chambers.
And who should be sitting there; the judge.
Judge: Hey kid, are you familiar with the liquor store across the street from the courthouse?
Kid: (nods).
Judge: Good, I want you to go across the street and steal me a bottle of booze.
The kid runs across the street, enters the liquor store, and when the proprietor is not looking, slips a fifth into the briefcase and brings it back to the judge.
The judge immediately opens the bottle and swigs half of it.
Judge: Hey kid, I need you to run another errand. There's a contractor, Slapdash Construction, next to the liquor store. Go to them and tell them that the judge sent you. They'll give you a brown paper bag. Bring it back to me.
The kid runs to Slapdash Construction, tells them that the judge sent him, receives a brown paper bag filled with fifties and hundreds, puts it into the briefcase and takes it to the judge.
Judge: Kid, you did great. Now unzip my fly.
The kid unzips the judge's fly.
Judge: Now suck my dick!
Kid: Hey wait a minute mister. I'm not a real attorney; I just found this briefcase in the courtroom! -
Physical Disability
There was a short fellow named Jack on trial for raping a woman, aided by a bucket. He adamantly protested his innocence, claiming inability.
Well, the judge said, "If you can prove you were physically incapable of raping this woman, we will certainly acquit you."
So the little guy stands on top of the bucket, and sure enough, he doesn't even come up to the woman's crotch. Keeping his word, the judge acquits him.
About a month later, the judge passes Jack on the sidewalk and says to him, "So... now that you've been freed of all charges, tell me, did you rape that woman?"
"Sure did!" Jack replies. "But how? You didn't even come up to her crotch."
"Oh, you must have misunderstood. I just threw the bucket on top of her head and swung from the handle!"