Banta to Santa: What's exactly this One-Night-Stand?
Santa: It's very simple. First, you you go into a bar at night. Then you hook some girl and offer her drinks. Then somehow, you take her to your room. Then you offer her more drinks to make a mood. And if she sleeps before the act, then it'll be your One-Night-Stand!
Santa's uncle fell from stairs at night and died. Santa sends message to all his contacts - UNCLE EXPIRED DUE TO NIGHT FALL!
Banta: Tumhari Shaadi Judwa Behen Mein Kisi Ek Se Ho Gayi To Tum Apni Biwi Ko Kaise Pehchanoge?
Santa: Sharmayi to Saali aur Chillayi to Gharwali!
Santa and Jeeto lying in a bed. Jeeto flings her one leg on Santa's shoulder and whispers - Take me! Santa did not pay attention to that. Jeeto flings on her second leg and repeats - Take me!
Santa: I'm not going anywhere!
Santa: Have you heard of the new movie called 'Constipation'?
Banta: No. Has it been released?
Santa: No. It hasn't come out yet!
Doctor after examining Santa: Have you ever given yourself a prostate examination?
Santa: Not deliberately, but my wife sometimes buys cheap toilet paper!
Santa to his wife, "Let's try anal tonight".
Jeeto: Fuck that shit!
Santa: That's the spirit!
Banta: How many pegs do you like to drink every evening?
Santa: I enjoy 2 pegs of whisky each evening for it's health benefits.
Banta: Just 2 pegs?
Santa: The rest of the bottle is for my flawless dance moves; and to make my wife look more appealing, so I can make it out with her!
Santa while fondling his mistress breasts, was mumbling, "Oh my Gujarat! Oh my Gujarat!"
Mistress: Why are you calling them Gujarat?
Santa: This seems to be the only way to develop them!
Santa: My boss says I could be replaced by a machine.
Banta: That's funny, that's what my wife says!