Do you know that you would look great with two pounds less ... in my opinion those clothes weigh exactly two pounds!
Ur my Funny, Understanding, Cute, Kind, Intelligent, Naughty, Great, Sweet, Honest, Independent, Truthful friend in short u r my F.U.C.K.I.N.G S.H.I.T. friend.
Feeling bored? Think of me.
Feeling sad? Call me.
Feeling lonely? See me.
Feeling horny? Use ur hand & njoy the art of messaging.
I hereby place u under arrest 4 violating code 069 distracting public with ur xtreme good looks & sex appeal. Remain silent & report 2 my bedroom.
Today it's cool to have small cars and small computers. Soon it will be cool to have a small penis too then you my friend will be THE MAN!!
I wish I was a teddy bear, that lay upon your bed, so everytime you cuddled it, you cuddled me instead.
God made butter, god made cheese; god made you for me to squeeze.
God made whiskey, god made Pepsi and when he made you he made you SEXY!
U r so sexy u drive me insane, I luv u so much that my heart is in pain. Ur sexy voice puts me in a slumber, oh damn I'm sorry I have the wrong number.
Kisses blown r kisses wasted. Kisses r not kisses unless they r tasted.
Kisses spread germs and germs r hated, but u can kiss me baby I'm vaccinated.
A gud friend is like a gud bra... hard 2 find- comfortable- supportive- prevents u from falling- holds u tight- and is always close 2 ur heart!