Guys wait for the perfect girl = Playboy's fault
Girls wait for the perfect guy = Disney's fault
Q: What two things in the air can make a woman pregnant?
A: Her legs!
Q: What do Viagra and Disney Land have in common?
A:They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two minute ride!!
A kid asked a priest, "Father, besides praying do you have any other pass-time?"
The priest tapped the kids cheek & calmly replied, "Nun my child, nun".
If you invite a girl over to watch a movie and you actually watch a movie, you're a failure as a man.
This is 'A' & 'B' conversation... So 'C' your way out before 'D' jumps over 'E' & 'F's you up like a 'G'.
A lawyer's youth and a whore's old age are the most difficult phases of their careers.
Touch it gently, put 2 fingers inside. If it's wide, use 3 fingers. Make sure, it's wet before you rub it up & down. Yep, that's how you wash a glass!
