| Pro Tip: You can know all the things wrong about you from your wife by simply forgetting her birthday! |
| Various researchers and studies found that if women sleep long hours, it reduces brain strokes, blood pressure, diabetes and heart attacks in men! |
| Woman 1: You said you wouldn't marry anyone. Men are animals. Still, you agreed to marry a guy! Woman 2: It is not a bad idea to pet an animal! |
| Wife: Ugh I gained 3 lbs during vacation. What about you? Me (looking at scale showing I actually lost a pound): I gained 4! |
| Carpets are dangerous. My wife tripped over it and I ended up sleeping on the sofa. Okay, I laughed when she fell, but still! |
| For our anniversary dinner, my wife gave me the freedom to choose whichever restaurant she wants me to choose! |
| Wife: You need to exercise more often. Me showing fitness app on phone: See, I did 5,200 steps last night. Wife: True, but those steps were around the dinner buffet! |
| They say early morning dreams come true. Today I had a dream about winning an argument with my wife, so finally.. wait, I also had a dream about meeting Santa Claus. Forget it! |
| During an argument with her husband, a wife was just about to calm down. But then her husband asked her to calm down! |
| First-year of marriage: I can't even imagine living without you. The tenth year of marriage: Maybe you should buy a new house and move out! |
