-
Childhood is like being drunk. Everyone remembers what you did, except you. -
Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat. -
I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them. -
The last time anyone told me I looked hot, I was in a Sauna. -
![Whoever said money doesn't buy happiness, obviously didn't know where to shop.]()
Upload to Facebook Whoever said money doesn't buy happiness, obviously didn't know where to shop. -
![I'm not drunk, I'm just talking in cursive.]()
Upload to Facebook I'm not drunk, I'm just talking in cursive. -
Beauty lies in the hidden file folders of my cell phone. -
![I'm not fat. I'm just so sexy that it overflows.]()
Upload to Facebook I'm not fat. I'm just so sexy that it overflows. -
![Make the little things count. Teach midgets math.]()
Upload to Facebook Make the little things count. Teach midgets math. -
Please enjoy alcoholism responsibly!
