Jeeto: My daughter told me she passed her pregnancy test.
Preeto: OMG!
Jeeto: I'm so glad I have clever kids!
Jeeto and Preeto were engaged in gossip.
Jeeto: Yesterday, I was feeling very depressed and my husband tried his best to console me.
Preeto: Then what happened?
Jeeto: He could console me only 2 times!
Jeeto went to swim in Bra and Panty. The attendant said, "M'am, a 2-piece costume is not allowed here."
Jeeto asks, "Which one shall I take off?"
In a divorce court Jeeto requested the judge: "Your honor, I want to divorce my husband, Santa."
"But why?" asked the judge.
Jeeto: Because he is not faithful to me.
Judge: How do you know?
Jeeto: My lord, not a single child resembles him!
Jeeto and Preeto are shopping together at the supermarket.
When they get to the vegetables, Jeeto lifts a good sized potato in each hand and says, "You know, Preeto, these remind me of Santa's balls."
Jeeto, impressed says, "Hmm, that big, huh?"
"No", Jeeto answers. "That dirty!"
Pappu: Mom, Didi Ko Sab Log 'MAAL' Kahte Hein, Aapko Kyu Nahi?"
Jeeto: Beta, Shaadi Se Pehle Mein Bhi MAAL Thi, Tere Papa Ne 'L' Ghis Ghis Kar, 'Maa' Bana Diya!
Santa: Darling, I have to confess that when I'm having sex with you, I sometimes think about other women.
Jeeto: You bastard... when I have sex with other men, I always think about you!
Jeeto: I have a proof that you're having an extra-marital affair with our neighbour's wife.
Santa: What's the proof?
Jeeto: Last night, the guy came to our house wearing your underwear!
Santa came home to find evidence that his wife had been unfaithful.
Santa: Was it my friend Banta?
Jeeto: No, it wasn't.
Santa: Was it my friend Bhupi?
Jeeto: No, it wasn't?
Santa: Was it my friend Joginder?
Jeeto screamed, "No it wasn't". "Don't you think I have any friends of my own?"
Jeeto: Doctor, doctor, I think I'm becoming a nymphomaniac.
Doctor: Why don't you lie down and tell me about it?