| My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive. Rodney Dangerfield |
| Familiarity breeds contempt - and children. Mark Twain |
| The difference between light and hard is that you can sleep with a light on. Anonymous |
| Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation ... The other eight are unimportant. Henry Miller |
| A good college is like unprotected sex: Glad you got in, wish you never came. Anonymous |
| An orgasm a day keeps the doctor away. Mae West |
| Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them. Steve Martin |
| The Big Bang definitely has erotic overtones. Jules Carlysle |
| There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem? Phyllis Diller |
| The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again. Erma Bombeck |