| If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all. Rodney Dangerfield |
| My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive. Rodney Dangerfield |
| Women are naturally secretive, and they like to do their own secreting. Arthur Conan Doyle |
| Abstinence is a perversion. Bill Maher |
| Some chicks are crazy just cause your mans' on a diet, doesn't mean he doesn't check out the menu. Anonymous |
| I didn't practice abstinence, I perfected it. Dennis Wolfberg |
| Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity. Albert Einstein |
| A promiscuous person is a person who is getting more sex than you are. Victor Lownes |
| Sex is nobody's business except the three people involved. Woody Allen |
| When the authorities warn you of the dangers of having sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities. Matt Groening |