| Motivational quotes are like orgasms. Pretty moving at the instant but don't last long and you basically seek again! |
| Ambulances and women have a lot in common. They both make a lot of noise to let you know that they're coming! |
| Girl 1: Why did you break-up with Vishal? Girl 2: Kyonki Uska Sirf Naam Hi Vishal Hai! |
| This guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 7 shots of vodka. The bartender says, "Wow, must be a big occasion?" The guy says, "Yeah, my first blowjob." The bartender says, "How about I give you the 8th shot on the house." The guy says, "If 7 shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will!" |
| The Canadian government, in its eternal wisdom, recently passed two laws. They are: 1. Legalized gay marriage 2. Legalized marijuana Legalizing gay marriage and marijuana at the same time now makes perfect Biblical sense. Leviticus 20:13 says: "If a man lies with another man, they should be stoned." Apparently, we just hadn't interpreted it correctly before! |
| Abdul: I am banging two twins these days. Friend: How do you differentiate between them? Abdul: It's easy. One colours her nails pink and the other has a dick! |
| 5 Science words to avoid saying when your class is finally on task: 1. Organism 2. Uranus 3. Fungus 4. Stamen 5. Pistill |
| I read that on an average Indian couples have sex twice a week, whereas Japanese couples have sex only once in six months. I had no idea I was Japanese! |
| I have come to a point in my life where I need a stronger word than Fuck! |
| I had a threesome last night. Two people didn't show up though, so I had to take matters into my own hands! |
