| Ladies - please remember Mouth wash is always cheaper than an 'ABORTION'! |
| Dear Dad, Thanks for not using a condom. Yours sincerely, Your son! |
| Don't forget to thank your father for bringing you into this world. Your mother was probably tired and not in the mood! |
| A happy day to all fathers. The real Mother-Fuckers! |
| Sex Life and Coca-Cola Two old friends meet after many years. They talk about their past life. One asks the other, "And how's your sex life?" The other replied, "Same as Coca-Cola!" The first asked, "Oh great! Full of vubbles, eh?" The second replied, "Nothing like that... before it was 'Normal' then it became 'Light' and now it is 'Zero'!" |
| Pro tip for guys: Never masturbate in an aircraft. They take high jacking very seriously |
| On a condom dispensing machine in London it was written: "Very Safe! Strictly made as per High British standards". Someone added below- "So was the Titanic, but it leaked!" |
| From the Internet You know what turns me on? . . . . . . Unprotected Wi-fi |
| Battalion Cocktails... An Army Battalion was having a cocktail party to welcome the new Brigade Commander. A circular was sent out to all: "Cockfail at 7 PM sharp at the Officers Mess." The Commanding Officer saw the spelling mistake and asked the Adjutant to amend it. The Adjutant did & it read: "Refer to circular, read tail, instead of fail cock stands, as it is." |
| Ladies, when you catch a guy staring at your chest, he is not looking at your boobs, he is staring into your heart. |
