Tony sits down at the bar, orders a drink and holds his head in his hands.
When the bartender comes back, Tony is swearing softly under his breath and shaking his head.
"Hey Tony, what's happening?" asks the bartender.
"I'm in DEEP SHIT," Tony replies. "I just got caught screwing my neighbour."
"Oh wow!" says the barman, "Who caught you? Your wife?"
"No," said Tony, "HIS wife!"
Two gay guys were caught in the act in a public park by a policeman. As the cop tried to arrest them for their act of public indecency, they bolted away.
The cop pursued after them and managed to catch one of them.
He told him, "When I catch your boyfriend I'm going to shove this nightstick right up his ass."
Just then a voice calls out from behind a tree. "Yoo-hoo, Officer. I'm over here."