Mature Jokes

Anna is working in the kitchen when Paddy enters with his first erection in years. "Anna...Anna... get into bed," he says.
She takes off her apron, puts all the ingredients and utensils away, washes her hands, takes off her undies...

One hot summer day, a redneck came to town with his dog, tied it under the shade of a tree, and headed into the bar for a cold one. Twenty minutes later, a policeman entered the bar and asked, "Who owns the dog tied under that....

Maria had just gotten married, and being a traditional Italian she was still a virgin. On her wedding night, staying at her mother`s house, she was very nervous. Her mother reassured her, "Don`t worry, Maria, Tony`s a good man...

Ek Aadmi Badie Pareshan Haal Mein Apne Familly Doctor Ke Pass Gaya.
Aadmi: Dr. Saab, Mene Hamesha Apni Biwi Se Condom Laga Ke Sex Kiya Hai Fir Bhi Uske 3 Bachche Ho Gaye.
Dr Hairan Ho Ke: Achha? Kamal Hai Yaar. Vaise Tum Condom...

An Irish wife was having a shower and slipped over on the bathroom floor. Instead of slipping over forwards, she slipped over and did the splits and suctioned herself to the floor. She yelled out for her husband, "Paddy! Paddy!"
Paddy came running in....

A lady was laying on the doctor`s table, waiting for her annual pap test. The doctor came in, and as he was preparing himself, she mentioned that she had 6 kids. He said, "Yeah, I can tell...

Mrs. Smith pulled Mrs. Jones out of earshot of the porch, where Mrs. Jones` lovely young daughter, Linda, sat.
< "It is really none of my business," whispered Mrs. Smith, "but have you noticed what your daughter is doing...

Difference between Shit & Oohh Shit: A boy Threw a love letter to a girl but it fell on her brother... Shittt!
And Her brother was GAY... Ooohh Shit!
After wife`s delivery, Husband asks the nurse...

They made an engaging looking couple in the swank restaurant: The man was handsome, graying and obviously well off; the woman was a joy to any eye - very young, ravishing and delectable. As they each read their...

A man was going door-to-door doing a sexual survey in Santa`s neighbourhood. "How often a week do you sleep with your wife?" asked the inquirer.
"Eight times in a month...