Mature Jokes

Two nuns were walking towards the other side of town along a deserted alley way when they were confronted by two drunken sailors and raped. After the sailors had left...

A college professor is explaining to his class that pleasure is a mental state, and that many people overlook the things they already have.
He says, "A man who has developed...

The new hooker had just finished her first trick. When she came back down to the street, the seasoned veterans all gathered around to hear the details.
She said, "Well, he was a big...

When Santa and Jeeto got married, he was a very experienced man but she was a virgin and totally naive. On their wedding night, when Santa removed his clothes...

Colin meets a girl on the street. He says, "Come on, babe, let's go in the alleyway and get it on. I've got fifteen bucks."
She says, "FIFTEEN bucks? You're crazy. For fifteen bucks...

The tenant crept into the bed with the landlord's wife and proceeded to seduce her. She angrily pushed him away and said, "Stop it, or I will tell my husband...

Hi! How are you?
Fine. But I think I have a sore throat…
I know what to do. Every time when I have a sore throat I'm having an oral sex...

Joan Collins went to the gyno for an examination.
As the doctor moved his head down betwen her legs he said excitedly, "That's the biggest one...

"How did your evening with your new boyfriend go?"
"It was a disaster. We were nude in bed in heavy...

A college graduate was suffering from constipation, so his doctor prescribed suppositories.
A week later the grad complained to the doctor that...