Mature Jokes

George has decided to get married, but not just to anybody. He wants to marry a virgin, a good girl that hasn`t fooled around and won`t ever. After a bit of thinking, he makes up this scheme to tell good girls...

One of my co-workers is quite graphic about his sexual powers. When he recently got married he took a lot of good natured ribbing from co-workers, but one of the funniest things I heard was when he was asked by another guy...

A young innocent girl is about to go on her 1st date and is given some word of advise and warning by her mother` "Look darling, they all want the same, so do be very careful and don`t you ever let him...

A young Jewish man had just finished high school and wanted to go to college. He approached his father and said, "Dad, would you send me to college?"...

An avid male golfer`s buddies were going to be out of town for the weekend so he decided to go down to the golf course and see if any group might need a ...

Two nuns from abroad have just arrived in the United States by boat and one says to the other, "I hear that the people of this country actually eat dogs."
"Odd," her companion replies, "but if we shall live in America...

A man was shopping in the men`s department at Bloomingdale`s when he noticed an absolutely beautiful woman behind the sales counter. He went up to her and said, "Good morning, madam."
She smiled pleasantly and asked...

An Aussie, a Yank, and a Texan were telling tall tales. "In Australia," the Aussie said, "we have sheep that are so big they take all day to be shorn."
"That`s nothing," the Yank said. "Our cattle are so big...

A very naive British sailor is in a bar in London. He meets a wild girl, and she takes him upstairs. She takes off her pants and her panties. He looks between her legs, and he says, "What`s that...

"Miss, I`m sorry but we can`t employ you as a center-fold model", the editor of a men`s magazine explained. "It`s all too obvious that your blonde hair isn`t natural, since the hair between your legs is black...