Mature Jokes

A Scottish man was taking a stroll down a country lane, where he meets up with a curious lady. She walks up to him and says, "They tell me that you people don`t wear...

Harry noticed he was running low on rubbers, so he stopped by the local drugstore.
"What size?" asked the blonde, pharmacist`s assistant, sweetly.
When he admitted he wasn`t sure of his size, the blonde...

There were these two gay guys that give each other anal each night. One night before they give each other anal one of the guys has to go to the toilet...

1. Men are like Laxatives - They irritate the crap out of you.
2. Men are like Bananas - The older they get, the less firm...

A guy applied to join a nudist club.
"Exactly what do you do here?" he asked.
It`s quite simple," said the club secretary, "We take off all our clothes and...

A large multi-million-dollar company placed an ad in "PERSONNEL WANTED":
Multi-million-dollar CONDOM company looking for CEO, Executives, Managers, Sales Rrepresentatives...

1. You can GET chocolate.
2. Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft.
3. You can safely have chocolate while you are driving....

A businessman was preparing to go on a long business trip, so he thought he`d buy his wife something to keep her occupied...

A certain zoo had acquired a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks, the female gorilla became very ornery...

There Are At Least eight types of orgasm for a woman.
1. The Optimist - Oh Yes, Oh Yes...