Mature Jokes

A gas station in Mississippi was trying to increase its sales so the owner put up a sign saying "Free Sex with Fill-up."
Soon a local "redneck" pulled in, filled his tank, and then asked for his free sex...

Sadie and Yetta, two widows were talking: Sadie, "That nice Morris Finkelman asked me out for a date. I know you went out with him last week, and I wanted to talk with you before I give him an answer...

There once was a religious young woman who went to Confession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."
The priest said, "Confess your sins and...

The anatomy lesson for the week was the way in which the body of a handicapped person compensates for its deficiency. As an example, the professor showed a slide of a man with no legs whose arms and shoulders had consequently...

Jack goes to his friend Mike and says, "I`m sleeping with the priest`s wife.. Can you hold him in church for an hour after mass for me?"
The friend doesn`t like it but being a friend, he agrees...

An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time. Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married. Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had...

Once upon a time there was a 98-year old woman whose billionaire husband died. The woman had inherited all of her deceased husband`s fortune and decided she would see if she could remarry herself a fine young man. So, she walked...

Two housewives were drinking coffee together. "On my way over here," said Louise, "I developed an awful headache. Do you have any good remedies?"
Her friend Martha responded, "When I get a headache...

Reunion is when Akhil gets up in the morning and tells his wife he is going to work. Instead he goes to his neighbour Paul's wife to make love to her. Her husband Paul comes and knocks on the door...

A hot shot East Coast newspaper reporter was on assignment in Arkansas, when he struck up a conversation with a young lady in a bar. After a half dozen drinks, he suggested they get their own bottle and retire to his motel...