Mature Jokes

A man was shopping in the men`s department at John Lewis when he noticed an absolutely beautiful woman behind the sales counter. He went up to her and said, "Good morning, madam." She smiled pleasantly and asked...

All the farmers for a hundred miles around were attending the wedding of a young Australian couple. Waiting for things to get started, they were somewhat shocked to see the bride`s father storm up the aisle...

A man goes into a little neighborhood pub, and when he sits down, he notices a beautiful woman sitting at the other end of the bar. He waves to her, and much to his surprise, she winks back at him. It doesn`t take long before...

Mary went to the doctor complaining of body odor. "Do you wash?" the doc asked the rank young girl.
"Oh, yes," Mary answered. "Each morning, I start at my head and...

A Texas Redneck was driving his old pick up truck down the road with his girlfriend at his side when all of a sudden the truck started to buck and stall. With that, he said to his girlfriend that he had...

Two brothers enlisting in the Army were getting their physicals. During the inspection, the doctor was surprised to discover that both of them possessed abnormally long penises. "How do you account for this...

Well, it just so happens to have originated through the Father of our Country Way back when, George Washington was crossing the Delaware River with his troops. There were 33 in Washington`s boat. It was extremely...

There`s an airplane and it`s about to crash so the pilot tells the stewardess to go prepare the passengers for a crash landing. She walks down the isle and there`s a guy smoking cigarette after cigarette. She says...

A college coed finished her degree at a college in a small farming town in Oregon. Her fiance had another semester to go to finish his degree and then they planned to marry in the spring. So the young...

This hot teen told her classmate, "I`ll let you do it for $20... $10 to put it in and $10 to take it out."
The boy quickly agreed. The couple went into the woods, and the young thing slipped off her panties...