Mature Jokes

A teacher called Mrs. Franny, arrived at school on her first day. She met with the school`s principal, who greeted her with, "Good Morning Mrs. Fanny."

Mrs Franny sighed, "It`s not Fanny, it`s Franny. Oh God, I hope...

There are these two firemen in a smoke filled room. One of them is butt fucking the hell out of the other one. The chief walks in and says, "What the hell is going on in here?"
The one on top says, "Sir I found him in here passed...

An elderly lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat tight so that it would not blow away in the wind. A gentleman approached her and said, "Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward but...

Two hot young ladies are talking one afternoon about the weekend just past. The first named Laura, and the second, Linda, discussed Laura`s last date. "You know what Linda, I was out last night with an intellectual type...

At big event this guy is carrying two plates of food from the buffet- one for his girl-friend and one for himself. As they enter the large hall to sit at a long table, everyone looks up and starts moving their chairs to...

Staring at her naked body, I asked what she wanted. She told me to go for something between a smack and a stroke. So I went for a smoke.
Frantically I tore off her dress, bra and knickers. My heart was racing but I just managed to...

A couple bought themselves a squirrel pet. One night they went out for dinner and locked the squirrel in the closet. Later that night a thief broke into their house. The thief was in the process of stealing the couple`s valuables...

At around 11:15 a girl gets a text from her boyfriend.
Boy: Hey, its over now.
Girl texts him back: What the fuck??? But what I did to you, why the fuck are you doing this, I have done anything you and...

A very `straight and honest` girl is going to Town. Before she left, her mother gave her some advice, "Daughter, when you`re in Town and if you`re looking for a match there, you must take note of the following the requirements...

A man is walking around the streets of the city one day when he spies an old friend of his from college. "George!" he yells. "I haven`t seen you in ages! How have you been?"
"Well, I am the Clarinet player...