Mature Jokes

A gynecologist waits for his last patient, who does not arrive. After an hour, he makes a gin and tonic to relax. After he settles into an armchair to read the newspaper, he hears the doorbell ring....

A woman from Alabama, who knew absolutely nothing about sex, fell in love with a man and agreed to marry him. As their wedding day approached, she became very nervous about her impending deflowering...

An old lady dies and goes to heaven. She is chatting to St. Peter at the Pearly Gates when all of a sudden she hears the most awful blood-curdling screams. "Don`t worry about that," says St. Peter...

There was a man and a woman in a parked car at a drive in movie. They were having sex in the back-seat of a small sports car when the man suddenly slipped a disk in his back! He was stuck...

Father Harris was motoring along a country lane in his parish on a spring afternoon when all of a sudden he got a flat tire. Exasperated, the priest stopped his car, got out, and assessed the damage...

I`ve lived a few years in my home, and the pretty neighbour next door and I always flirted with each other, despite her being married. One day, when speaking to her husband, he said, "I need to have my apartment...

As the groom entered the church, the best man noticed he had the biggest, brightest smile on his face. "Boy, you sure look happy to be getting married."
The groom replied...

A couple was on vacation up in the woods. One morning, the husband got up before dawn, went fishing and returned, just as his wife was rising. While he slept, she decided to take his boat out to the middle of the lake...

Two guys were walking down the street one day when they came across a small pair of gym shorts on the ground. They decided to put a sign up on the church bulletin board so the rightful owner...

A man went to visit his grandparents and arrived to find his grandpa sitting on the front porch, in the rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down. "Grandpa, what are you doing?" he exclaimed...