Santa: Why do you keep getting vasectomies? I believe it's been 6 times. Banta: I have no choice. My wife keeps getting pregnant.
Santa (in a bad mood): Why do you bother wearing a bra? You don't have anything to put in it!?
Jeeto (wryly): Well, you wear briefs, don't you?
Santa: I had a wet dream about you last night.
Jeeto: Wow, what a sea change! Now I am in your dreams also. I am so lucky. What happened next?
Santa: You were drowning.
Santa: My wife often complained about my lack of interest in her family.
Banta: What did you do to counter it?
Santa: I slept with her sister.
Santa walks into the bar and orders 2 shots of whisky and he drinks one and pours the other shot on his hand. He did this 3 times before the bartender finally asks him, "Why is it you drink one shot and pour the other on your hand? Santa replies, "I'm getting my girl friend drunk!"
Banta and his wife went for a honeymoon trip. After enjoying the honeymoon for a week Preeto says, "Dear, let's go back".
Banta: Why Dear?
Preeto: Seven days make a whole week (hole weak).
Santa doing SWOT analysis:
Strength is my wife;
Weakness is my neighbour's wife;
Opportunity is when my neighbour is on tour;
Threat is when I am on tour.
Santa: Always close your curtains next time you make love to your wife, all the neigbours were laughing at you yesterday.
Banta: Well, the laugh is on them because yesterday, I wasn't fucking in the house.
Santa: My girlfriend just texted me saying, "I want you to get me wet when I get home."
Banta: So you're all set.
Santa: I can't wait. I've got 15 water balloons ready.
Santa goes into brothel in Bangkok & asks the madam for the fattest bird with the saggiest tits and a minge like a ripped out old fireplace, the madam asks, "Feeling kinky, Sir?" "No" replies Santa, "just fucking homesick!"
