I used to go out with a girl who punched me in the face when she orgasmed.
I didn't mind too much until I found out she was faking them.
A girl was getting raped. She threatened to call the cops.
The rapist said, "OK, go ahead. Let's see who cums first!"
Two kids are arguing over whose father is the biggest scaredy-cat.
The first kid says, "My dad is so scared that when lightning strikes, he hides underneath the bed."
The second kid replies,"Yeah? Well, that's nothing. My dad is so scared that when my mom has to work the night shift, he sleeps with the lady next door!"
The best example of getting satisfaction in others' happiness:
Watching Porn!

Explain rape:
It's a difficult job, something like playing golf with a moving hole.
Big boobs don't count if you're fat;
And well, big dicks don't count if you are one!
Responses during Sex:
Mistress: Wow! Darling this is great!
Whore: Come on finish it now!
Girlfriend: Ah! Please slowly!
Wife: Ceiling needs painting!
Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen.
Women reach theirs at thirty-five.
Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
Fact: We live in a society where people have unprotected sex but got a case for their iPhone!
Guy: She's hot.
Girl: She's a bitch.
Girl: He's hot.
Guy: He's gay.