5 missed calls from your girlfriend means, you missed a fuck;
5 missed calls from your wife means, you are fucked!
A guy's point of view:
Sex is evil;
Evil is sin;
Sin is forgiven;
So let us begin!
When a lady is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say, 'Congrats'!
But none of them comes and touches the man's 'dick and says "Well done"!
Moral: Hard work is never appreciated, only result matters!
What's the difference between an Umbrella and a Blouse?
UMBRELLA - you press and open;
BLOUSE - you open and press
Enjoy the monsoon with press and open or with open and press. Choice is yours, either ways you'll get wet!
Dear Girls,
If your neck is white and your face is orange, you're doing it wrong!
The worst part of being caught masturbating by your girlfriend is explaining that it's technically her fault?
A tie is men's equivalent attire to women's dupatta (veil).
While a dupatta can hide a woman's assets, the tie is man's way of pointing to where their asset is!
Why are female Tennis players jealous of female Badminton players?
Any guesses? No!
.
..
...
Because Tennis gets only 'Balls' to play whereas Badminton players get to play with a 'Cock' and that too, that shuttles all the time!
You're really stupid if you visit an ice-cream parlour instead of a pharmacist when your girlfriend says,
"I love chocolate flavour"!
Dear Boys,
If she asks the waiter to serve the gravy on a corner of the plate and not on the rice, that's the first sign she won't swallow!
