A man's elbow accidentally scrapes a lady's breasts.
Man: If your heart is as soft as your breast, you'll forgive me.
Lady: If your dick is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 320.
Q: Why was Philip's girlfriend disappointed?
A: Because she found out that Philips 12" was a television.
Some gals beg and some gals borrow;
Some gals lead and some gals follow;
Some brings joy and some bring sorrow;
But the best of all are the girls that swallow!
Q: What three things are common between the sun and a woman's underwear?
A: Both are hot, both look better while going down and both go down at night.
Q: What's the difference between riding a bicycle and riding a woman?
A: While riding a bicycle you fix your ass & move your legs; but while riding a woman, you fix your legs & move your ass.
Q: To make it straight she pulls it; to make it stand she rubs it; to make it stiff she licks it; And to let it in she pushes it. What's she doing?
A: Threading a needle
Three guys introduce themselves to a girl.
Hi, I am Peter-not a Saint.
Second: I am Paul-not a Pope.
Third: I am John-not a Baptist.
The girl retorts back. Nice to see you all. I am Mary-not a Virgin!
Dear Crush,
If your "shower brb" was intended to make me imagine you naked, then it's "Mission Accomplished"!
A guy while giving speech to deaf people, rubs chest, touches groin and starts masturbating. When asked about the reason for doing so, replies that it means, "Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure..."
Stupidity is not attractive. If you can't turn my brain on, you'll never get my panties off.
