
3 Irish men in a pub called Mick, Pat and Tat. The barman says, "Are you all related?" Mick said, "Yeah we're triplets!" The barman said, "Triplets!, how come you and Pat are 6ft tall and Tat is only 4-Ft tall?". "Well!" said Mick "Me and Pat were breastfed so there was no tit for Tat!

Wife: I'm having a headache.
Husband: Do you know that sex can cure headaches?
Wife: No thanks, I prefer paracetamol. At least, it lasts for more than 3 minutes!

Patient: Doctor, I took two COVID-19 tests today. The nasal swab was negative (-) but the anal swab was positive (+).
What does this make me?
Doctor: A battery!

The first month, the boss gave his good-looking secretary a frock as an incentive. And in the second month, he 'raised' the incentive!

You can be a Doctor and save lives;
You can be a Lawyer and defend lives;
You can be a Soldier and protect lives;
or
Remain a Fucker and create lives!

How is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a great hand, you don't need a partner!

Murdering English:
One Branch Manager while searching for new premises for the branch, sent a message to his Regional Office.
The Landlady is ready to give her upper portion.
If we press hard she will give lower too!

Some bloody thought:
Bill (Clinton) had to go to Monica for a blowjob because Uski Biwi Sirf...
Hila-ry Thi

A family is driving home and passes a sporting goods store that's being renovated.
The wife says, "Look, they're expanding Dick's."
The husband says, "Sign me up!"

A professor told his class: "Fame will come to you only after you succeed!" A blonde asked, "Who is 'Seed'?"