Ancient Egyptian Architect: "Do you know how to build a pyramid?" Ancient Egyptian Builder: "Well, err yeah, upto a point!" |
Doctor: Can we talk about your weight? Certainly. It was about 20 minutes, but at least the chairs didn't break this time! |
I quit my job at the concrete plant. My job was getting harder & harder! |
I told my boss, `Sorry I'm late. I was having computer issues.` Boss: Hard drive? Me: No, the commute was fine. It's my laptop! |
A boat builder is proudly showing his young son the family forest. He turns to him and says... Son, one day all this will be oars! |
I am not addicted to social media. I just use it when I have time. Like, Lunch time, Dinner time, This time, That time, All the time! |
I had to apologize to my wife today and had to promise her that I'll not do anything again in her dreams that could upset her again! |
Interviewer: What are your strengths? Boy: I fall in love easily. Interviewer: Okay, what are your weaknesses? Boy: Those blue eyes of yours! |
Considering my precarious financial position, I need to maintain social distancing from my debit and credit cards too! |
People associate wearing glasses with being smart, but you have to fail a test to get them! |