| A friend doesn`t go on a diet because you are fat. |
| The biggest problem with quotes found on the internet is that they're never really accurate. |
| Women are scientifically proven to be right even when they are wrong. |
| Women always worry about the things that men forget; men always worry about the things women remember. |
| In examinations, the foolish ask questions that the wise cannot answer. |
| Love makes the world go round? Not at all. Whiskey makes it go round twice as fast. |
| Everyone has the right to be stupid but some people abuse that privilege. |
| Money can't buy happiness, but poverty can't buy ANYTHING. |
| A man never tells you anything until you contradict him. |
| Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritation and resentments slip away, and a sunny spirit takes their place. |