Funny Quotes

  • People like crowds. The bigger the crowd, the more people show up. Small crowd, hardly anybody shows up.
    ~ Gallagher
  • The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
    ~ General George Patton
  • An epitaph is a belated advertisement for a line of goods that have been permanently discontinued.
    ~ Irvin S. Cobb
  • Banta: Mein New Zealand vich mundayan naal BUNGEE jumping khoob enjoy keeti. Tu kehri sports khedthi c ?
    Preeto: Mein vi pind vich mundayan naal MANJEE jumping khoob enjoy kitti c.
  • A fool always finds a greater fool to admire him.
    ~ Nicolas Boileau
  • Avoid employing unlucky people - throw half of the pile of CVs in the bin without reading them.
    ~ David Brent
  • The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.
    ~ Eden Phillpots
  • There are moments when everything goes well; don't be frightened, it won't last.
    ~ Jules Renard
  • Sure, there's no 'i' in team, but there is an 'm' and an 'e'.
    ~ Kevin Meyers
  • I consider myself blessed. I consider you blessed. We've all been blessed with God-given talents. Mine just happens to be beating people up.
    ~ Sugar Ray Leonard
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