| Apparently, over a quarter of pet owners let their pets sleep on the bed with them. I tried it, but my goldfish died! |
| Potatoes make french fries, chips, and vodka. It's like the other vegetables aren't even trying! |
| Some guy stopped me in the street and asked: "Why are you carrying a 9ft book?" I replied... "It's a long story"! |
| I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself "Well this changes everything"! |
| Punjabis have an additional vaccination in their infancy. It is called Chicken Tikka! |
| I just found out that 'Aarrgghh' is not a real word. I can't even tell you now how angry I am! |
| Interviewer: Tell me the thing you didn't add in your CV. Candidate: Truth! |
| Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher? She couldn't control her pupils! |
| Cassettes have side A and side B, so it's logical that its successor would be CD! |
| English man: How could you marry a Woman before knowing her? Indian man: How could you marry a Woman after knowing her? |
