| Security at every level of an airport is absolutely ridiculous. Until you get to the baggage claim. Then it's just like take whatever bag you want! |
| Tulsidas: Hey Kabir Kabir: Hey Hey Tulsidas's friend: Why did he say 'Hey' twice? Tulsidas: He is famous for Do-Hey! |
| At 20:00 hrs. Girlfriend: Honey, what's more important - Football or me? Boyfriend replied at 21:45 hrs: Of course you! |
| The human body can survive three weeks without food, three days without water but only three hours without WiFi! |
| Kids of today don't know what struggle is. During our times, we watched England Vs Nigeria matches on a B&W TV. If we increased brightness, English team disappeared... If we reduced brightness, Nigerian team disappeared. And if the wind blew a bit to sway the antenna... both the teams disappeared! |
| Interviewer: Do you think Brazil's 1970 team can beat today's Argentina? Pele: Yes. Interviewer: By how much? Pele: 1:0 Interviewer: That's it? Pele: Well, most of us are over 75 now! |
| Whilst cooking today, I accidentally rubbed some herbs in my eyes. I'm now parsley sighted! |
| Clouds basically drink water until they can't hold it any longer, then they pee on everything! |
| Just broke up with my cross eyed girlfriend. She was seeing someone else! |
| On my tombstone I want it written... If I rise after 2 days, I want more than a chocolate Easter Bunny! |
