| Confession is good for the soul but bad for your career. |
| Work is the greatest thing in the world, so save some for tomorrow. |
| The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it. |
| I considered atheism but there weren't enough holidays. |
| Accomplishing the impossible means only that the boss will add it to your regular duties. |
| Working is a delight, leave enough work for your colleagues. |
| As long as they pretend to pay me, I pretend I am working. |
| I visited the tax office. I wanted to know the people I work for. |
| Double your pleasure, photocopy your paycheck. |
| Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired. |