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You know what I hate about people?
Their existence!

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Ever look at someone and think, "Why has no one hit him with a shovel yet?"

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I don't care how bad we left off if you call me and tell me you need me,
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I'm gonna hang up and block your number forever!

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I love everybody.
Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid;
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And others I would love to punch in the face!

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I always hold my phone in my hand so if you think I am ignoring you, I am!

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How can you face your problem if your problem is your face!

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The more I know people, the more I know why God created the middle finger!

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I am not responsible for what my face does when you talk!

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I was going to give you a nasty look... but I see you already have one!

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Dealing with idiots is like playing soccer.
You can use your head, but a swift kick is usually more effective!