| If you're gonna be two-faced at least make one of them pretty. |
| Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could. |
| May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. |
| Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. |
| Puns are the highest form of literature. |
| Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. |
| Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way. |
| Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet. |
| A man who trusts everyone is a fool and a man who trusts no one is a fool. We are all fools if we live long enough. |
| Our relationship wasn't the sun, the moon, the stars, but it wasn't bullshit, either. |
