Mature Jokes

Staring at her naked body, I asked what she wanted. She told me to go for something between a smack and a stroke. So I went for a smoke.
Frantically I tore off her dress, bra and knickers. My heart was racing but I just managed to...

A couple bought themselves a squirrel pet. One night they went out for dinner and locked the squirrel in the closet. Later that night a thief broke into their house. The thief was in the process of stealing the couple`s valuables...

At around 11:15 a girl gets a text from her boyfriend.
Boy: Hey, its over now.
Girl texts him back: What the fuck??? But what I did to you, why the fuck are you doing this, I have done anything you and...

A very well-built young blonde was lying on her psychiatrist`s couch telling him how frustrated she was since she always failed at everything she seemed to try. "I`ve tried to be a secretary and failed," she complained. "I tried to be an...

A very `straight and honest` girl is going to Town. Before she left, her mother gave her some advice, "Daughter, when you`re in Town and if you`re looking for a match there, you must take note of the following the requirements...

A man is walking around the streets of the city one day when he spies an old friend of his from college. "George!" he yells. "I haven`t seen you in ages! How have you been?"
"Well, I am the Clarinet player...

One night a man heard howls coming from his basement and went down to discover a female cat being screwed by a mouse. Fascinated by what he saw, the man gained the mouse`s confidence with some cheese and then took him next door...

Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... Or that you could crawl into a hole??? Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did...

Ek Aadmi Apni Biwi Se Bahut Pyaar Karta Tha. Biwi Delivery Ke Liye Hospital Mein Thi Aur Usko Operation Room Mein Le Jaya Gaya.
Aadmi Ye Dekhkar Doctor Ke Paas Gaya Aur Bola: Doctor Sahab, Jitni Takleef...

An Australian family is most concerned that their 30-year-old son is unmarried. So they call a marriage broker and ask her to find their son a good wife. The broker comes over to their house and spends a long time asking...