Mature Jokes

A blonde went into a global message center to send a message to her mother overseas. When the man told her it would cost 200 bucks, she exclaimed, "I don't have that...

A young woman was a prostitute and, for obvious reasons, didn't want her grandmother to know. One day, the police raided a brothel and arrested a group of prostitutes...

A guy enters a bank to see about getting a business loan. "What kind of business do you want to start?" asks the bank manager.
"I have some black powder. You sprinkle it on a women...

A man and a woman were waiting at the hospital donation center. Man, "What are you doing here today?"
Woman, "Oh, I'm here to donate...

A man, new in town, goes to the best brothel in the city. Choosing the best looking girl in the place, he retires to a large and well-appointed suite, where he has...

A girl walked up to the information desk in her local hospital and said, "I, need, to see the upturn, please."...

Three Irish monks have passed all tests, except for one. It is the test of purity. So the other monks tie bells to their dicks and put them in a room with a naked...

A baby was born that was so advanced that he could talk. He looked around the delivery room and saw the doctor. "Are you my doctor...

A man and wife having finished foreplay when she asks the dreaded question. Darling would you use a condom? Reluctantly he leaves the bed, goes to the dresser and...

Two gay men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm, and then have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated. When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital...