Mature Jokes

One day a mother and father were having sex and their son walked in. "What are you doing," the kid asked.
"Well, you wanted a brother, so we`re making you one."
The next day, the father walks outside and sees...

This guy has been married for about 6 months when he runs into a guy from his wedding party. The guy asked him how married life was treating him. The married guy replied, "great except for one problem, our sex life...

Ek Ladke Ne Apni Girl-Friend Ko SMS Kiya: Kal Date Pe Tum Mujhe Kiss Karne Dogi N?
Girl: Nahi... Bilkul Nahin... Kisi Ne Dekh Liya Toh?
Boy: Please Ek Baar Karne Dena...

A guy goes to the doctor and says, "Doc my pecker has turned orange."
The doctor takes a look and says, "I`ve never seen anything like this before. We`ll have to run some tests to see if you...

A lady applied for the position of a house maid. Asked why she left her last employment, she said: Sir, the wages were good, the living conditions were quite comfortable but it was the most ridiculous place...

Charlie and George were sitting in the park, talking, when the subject turned to getting older.
Charlie said to George: Women have all the luck when it comes to getting older...

Perry fancied himself quite a ladies man, so when his cruise ship went down in a storm and he found himself stranded on a desert island with six women, he couldn`t believe his good fortune. They quickly agreed that...

A golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by a couple of strokes. The golfer says to him, "I`d give anything to sink this next putt."
A stranger walks up to him and whispers...

"Hello, help desk."
"Yes, this is Mrs. Duffy on the sixth floor. I want to report a violation of company policy."
"What seems to be the trouble, Mrs. Duffy...

A man is having problems with his penis, which certainly had seen better times. He consults a doctor who, after a couple of tests, says, "Sorry, but you`ve overdone it the last 30 years. Your penis is burned out..