Mature Jokes

By the middle of his senior year, the handsome history major had dated most of the girls on campus. One day, while seated in the student union, he looked up and saw the captain of the varsity football team coming toward him, an angry

Girlfriend: Can You Tell Me ??
What is My Bra Size ??
Boyfriend: It`s 36
Girlfriend: WOW!!! How do you know???
Boyfriend: Yesterday I...

The voluptuous redhead was walking down a dimly lit street when a man jumped out of the bushes.
"Give me your money," he demanded.
"I don`t have any," she managed to reply.
"Give me your money or I`ll...

It was spring in the old west. The cowboys rode the still snow choked trails looking for cattle that survived the winter. As one cowboy`s horse went around the narrow trail, it came upon a rattlesnake warming...

Grace and Martha were from a very prim and proper Eastern finishing school, and they were spending their vacation together in New York. On this particular afternoon, they had accepted an invitation from...

A guy went into the adult section of a department store to buy condoms. The female clerk told him, "We have the rainbow assortment on sale today, would you like those?"
The guy said, "Sure, I`ll take...

I met this girl and I told her, "I will give you $20 if you will have sex the way I want it."
She said, "No, I`m not some cheap whore."
I said, "I will give you $100 dollars if you have sex...

On the last day of his French class, Professor Lint goes over the final exam.
"The exam will test your comprehension. It`ll be divided into two parts: a multiple choice exam, and...

A priest and a rabbi were talking when the rabbi asked the priest about confession. "I have an idea," said the priest. Why don`t you sit with me on my side of the confession booth and hear it for...

Defense Attorney: Will you please state your age?
Little Old Lady: I am 72 years old.
Defence Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?
Little Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in my....