Clearancs sale!
Santa and Banta are running a store and decide to have a big blow-out clearance sale. Within 3 hours, everything is sold from the store.
Santa says to Banta, 'Well, what now? We`ve sold everything.'
Banta replies, 'Don`t worry, there`s this really stupid guy who comes in here everyday. We`ll have a few laughs on him.'
Sure enough, about 15 minutes later...
Wrong box !
Mrs Santa, Mrs Banta, and one of their friend Mrs Jugnu were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their husbands.
Mrs Jugnu said, 'I call my husband the dentist. Nobody can drill like he does.'
Mrs Banta, giggled and confessed, 'I call my husband...
Digging !
Santa and Banta are serving in Indian Army. Once they were handed shovels and told to bury a large, dead animal. While digging they got into an argument about what they were burying.
Santa, 'This is a big mule!'
Banta, 'This is not a mule, this is...
Winning side
Two farmers, Santa and Banta, lived as neighbors, but didn`t like each other much. There was a period of -10 degree centigrade cold and Santa and Banta had nothing to do because of it. So they bet a bottle of vodka who can sit out on the window ledge the longest with a bare ass.
After two hours Banta`s wife, Preeto, came home and asked Banta...
Giving Birth
A woman starts dating a doctor. Before too long, she becomes pregnant. About nine months later, just about the time she is going to give birth, Santa goes into the hospital for a prostate gland infection.
The doctor says to the woman, 'I know what we`ll do. After I`ve operated on Santa, I`ll...
Milking!
A farmer had advertised his farm and was showing it to Banta, a prospective buyer. As they walked along a fence line, Banta saw bee hives and stopped. He said, 'Those hives are pretty close to the road.'
The farmer explained that the bees just made honey and have never stung anyone.
Banta felt unsure about the sale until he proposed that...
A proposal for Santa
A certain zoo had acquired a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very ornery, and difficult to handle.
Upon examination, the zoo veterinarian determined the problem: she was in heat. What to do? There was no male of this species available.
While reflecting on their problem, the zoo administrators noticed Santa...
Sexual urges !
Captain Santa was transferred to a desert outpost. On his orientation tour he noticed a very old, seedy looking camel tied out back of the enlisted men`s barracks.
Santa asked the Sergeant leading the tour, 'What`s the camel for?'
The Sergeant replied, 'Well sir, it`s a long way from anywhere, and the men have natural sexual...
Men Need Most
Banta, a traveling salesman, checked into a futuristic motel. Realizing he needed a haircut before his next day`s meeting, he called down to the desk clerk and asked if there was a barber on the premises.
'I`m afraid not, sir,' the clerk told him, 'but down the hall is a special machine that should serve your purposes.'
Skeptical but intrigued, Banta located the appropriate machine, inserted...
Tried once
Well-dressed Banta entered an upscale restaurant in the 17 sector, Chandigarh, and took a seat at the bar.
The bartender came over and asked 'What can I get you to drink, sir?'
Banta responded, 'Nothing, thank you. I tried alcohol once, didn`t like it, and never tried it again.'
The bartender was a bit perplexed, but...
