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Upload to Facebook If your doctor prescribes you medication without first asking about...
- your diet
- your sleep
- your exercise routine
- your water consumption
- whether you have any structural issues &
- the stress in your life
Then you don't have a doctor, you have a drug dealer! -
Upload to Facebook I spent the whole day in the office doing nothing. Seeing this, some visitors thought that I was the manager! -
Upload to Facebook Patient: Doctor, my wife has terrible mood swings, gets angry for no reason and sometimes is totally irrational.
Doctor: She's a normal woman then. What's your concern? -
Upload to Facebook No more Suez Canal jokes!
That ship has sailed! -
Upload to Facebook I was really embarrassed when my wife caught me playing with my son's train set by myself. In a moment of panic, I threw a bedsheet over it.
I think I managed to cover my tracks! -
Upload to Facebook Boss: You can't sleep at work. Me: But I told you during my interview that I'm a dreamer! -
Upload to Facebook Before you complain about something your wife does, you should always walk a mile in her shoes. That way, you'll be a mile away from her and she won't hear you complaining. -
Upload to Facebook Dear Algebra, please stop asking us to find your X. She is never coming back, and don't ask why! -
Upload to Facebook When I was a child, I thought nap time was a punishment! -
Upload to Facebook A father took his six-year-old daughter to office on the "Take your kids to work day". The little girl ran around the office excitedly but soon started crying. The father and his concerned colleagues gathered around the girl trying to find out what upset her. Sobbing loudly the girl said "Daddy where are all the clowns you said you worked with?"
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